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Dear Pastor,

I am a 23-year-old woman. I am married to a man who I do not love. I was forced to get married to him because he got me pregnant. I had to decide whether I would marry him or abort the pregnancy.

When we discussed the matter, I told him that I was not ready to get married. He said he wanted his child, so he would not give me the money to do an abortion.

My mother is an evangelist. When she realised that I was pregnant, she said I am bringing disgrace on her. She questioned how she would face the young ladies in her church, as I was pregnant and unmarried. She spoke to the man who got me pregnant and he told her that he would get married to me, so I said I would do so.

We got married privately. Four of us were at the wedding. However, I am telling you the truth, I did not love this man. We had a one-night stand and that was when I got pregnant. Sometimes a girl can find herself into a situation where she is in need, and that was my case.

I have found myself cheating on my husband with the man I love from the beginning. This man, who I always love, is in a better position.

Sometimes I can't stand looking at my child's father. He is aware that I don't love him. I told my mother that I want a divorce, and she told me that I would end up in Hell because the Bible says that it is wrong to divorce your partner.

Please tell me if that is true.

- Y.A.

Dear Y.A.,

You have never really truly loved the man to whom you are married. You were forced into marriage, so you are not happy at all. Your husband knows that you are not happy with him. This marriage will not last unless you abandon your ways and try to love your husband. At least, make an effort to love him.

Make an appointment to see a family counsellor and lay out the whole situation. In the meantime, tell this man who you love so very much that you are trying to change, so you will not go back to bed with him.

I wish you well.

- Pastor