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Dear Pastor,

I am a regular reader of your column and I find it enjoyable. I am 17 years old and I have a boyfriend. I am living with my mother and step-father.

My step-father doesn't care what I do, so I do not say much to him. However, my mother and I are very close. She tells people that I am her best friend. I tell my mother everything, but I haven't told her that recently I had sex.

My boyfriend and I went to Port Royal one evening. My mother did not know that I went to his house as she thought I went to visit one of my schoolmates. However, it's my boyfriend who took me out and he impressed on me how much he wanted to have sex with me, and that he has been waiting on me for more than a year. His car is tinted so nobody can see us from outside, so he took my maiden in his car. He did not have protection, so I had my first sexual experience without the condom.

I am glad I did not get pregnant. Since we had sex he told me there was something he had to tell me. He recently told me that he had sex with another girl and he told her about me, and she said that he should leave me because I am just a schoolgirl and she is working.

My boyfriend is 23 years old; he said that the girl is 25. I am really displeased with my boyfriend. I don't understand why he would have sex with another woman when he could have come back to me and we could have sex another time. Now, I don't know what to do.

Do you think I should trust him? He said he will not do it again but I do not know if I should believe him. Please tell me what to do.

P.H.

Dear P.H.,

If you are not careful, your boyfriend will get you pregnant and you could become a burden to your mother. What you should understand is that you should learn to plan your future, and at 17, you are not really ready for motherhood. What you should endeavour to have is a good education.

Regardless of what people may say, education is the best way forward. You are not wasting your time by not having a child.

Your boyfriend shouldn't have forced you to have sex with him. You may consider him a good boy, but he sees you as a child. He had sex with an older woman and then he told you about it. He doesn't have much respect for you. I hope that you would not continue to have unprotected sex with him.

Pastor