ÐÓ°ÉÐÔ°É

Dear Pastor,

I need your help. I am a 37-year-old woman and I have two children. Their father and I were living together, but he became very abusive, and we broke up.

He was a man who took care of his children, but he hit me because we had a disagreement. We made up and he promised that it would not happen again, but he did it again. So, I left him.

I have always loved him, and his children love him. I saw that man cry before his children when he realised that I was leaving him. I packed up what I needed, and I left him in an empty house.

The house belongs to his grandparents. They are living abroad. For the last two years, I haven't had any relationship with a man. I am now with a man, and I have moved in with him. I don't love this man, but he gives me everything I need, and he takes care of my children. This man is 70 years old, and he is very strong. He also functions well.

This man asked me if I love him, and I told him I am hoping to get to love him. He said he was not happy with that answer, but he cannot force me love him. I really don't love this man, but I am hoping that as time goes by, I will get to love him.

Do you think that is possible?

My children call him uncle. My son says he is like a father to them, so they should call him daddy. I prefer if they call him uncle.

Since I have been with this man, he has bought me a car. However, he did not purchase the car in my name. I asked him why he did not purchase the car in my name and he says that he is not sure about me, and just as how I walked out on my husband, I may walk out on him. He said that if I am leaving him, I should leave the car keys.

I would love to hear from you.

L.O.,

Dear L.O.,

What you are trying to say is that you are with this much older man for what you can get. You are no longer with your children's father, but this man doesn't have a woman, and you see an opportunity to capture him. He has room in his heart for you and room in his house to accommodate everybody.

You cannot love a man if there is never a spark of love in your heart. Don't fool yourself, this man knows that you do not love him, and that is one of the reasons why he did not purchase the car in your name.

You did not say whether you are employed. My suggestion to you, therefore, is try and gain employment if you are not so engaged. In addition, you should examine your own heart to see whether there is any future for you and this man.

I am not going to tell you that there is no future at all because I am not God, but I would say to you that you are being a hypocrite. However, things can change, so I wish you well.

Pastor